Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the air… — Quoted

“Quotes”

“Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.”

Henny Youngman · Travel

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Henny Youngman

I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock.

Money

Henny Youngman

I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.

Car

Henny Youngman

This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.

Women

Henny Youngman

My dad was the town drunk. Most of the time that's not so bad but New York City?

Dad