“Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.”
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Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price.
I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?
Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.
