“People drain me, even the closest of friends, and I find loneliness to be the best state in the union to live in.”
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I can never tell when something is funny. I just have to do it onstage and find out.
Comedy was the key to everything. I grew up fast and controlled my future by bringing it on faster than it naturally unfolded. I cheated myself out of a childhood but then got a running headstart into adulthood that no one else could keep up with.
My parents are very funny when they have to deal with anything racy or off-color. They usually pretend they don't speak English.
Thankfully, beauty is easier to remove than apply, and a swipe of demaquillage in the right direction and you are you once again.
