“What has happened to the good old-fashioned travel agent? I want to go to a really posh travel agent and have them organise everything for me. I don't want to do things on the Internet.”
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I was trained as an actress. But I wasn't a very convincing actress, so I started doing punk poetry and then fell into doing stand-up.
I don't do marriage. I think it's incredibly naff. And I don't like vulgar displays of ostentation.
I've just got crap hair. Although I inherited a lot of stuff from my dad, including giant knees, I didn't get his good, thick hair. I got my mother's thin, wispy, non-event hair instead.
I'm very jealous of my daughter's education. She's been inspired by her teachers, and nobody inspired me as a teenager.
