Husbands are like fires - they go out when they're left unattended.
“I'm learning English at the moment. I can say 'Big Ben', 'Hello Rodney', 'Tower Bridge' and 'Loo'.”
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I've been screaming at the top of my lungs at my family, 'Work out! Work out! Old age is coming!'
Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable.