“Sometimes people offer you plays, they offer you parts, but they only offer it because I'm famous.”
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Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.
I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.
Hollywood's just not funny.
